I've had some time to fix this up a bit... So w00t for that!
I went for a walk and came across the Winooski River. It's something I used to drive over every day, but I've never found the time to come down to the actual river itself. Seeing as I was in the area I figured I'd go see it. I ended up finding a nice spot to just sit and think... and from there everything just seemed to come into focus. I had written something earlier in the day to vent, and I wasn't too happy with it. It was just uncessarily angry, and didn't really seem to go anywhere. After having a bit more time to process, as well as resolving several things throughout the day. I came up with this. I was tired and the original version of this was a bit fragmented, so I went back and touched it up and now I have this.
Moment...
In the cold of a winter morning…
My travels have lead me to a river…
The water rages below…
And snow slowly begins to fall…
Something has drawn me to this place…
As I gaze upon these waters…
I wonder to myself…
I stand here now:
A man defeated…
With an aching heart in these hands…
And upon my sleeve…
My mind is lost…
Searching for the words to speak...
Yet, what is left to say…?
My eyes have truly been opened this day…
The puzzle has become clear:
A lonely road continues…
Another horizon I must cross…
To find my star in the sky…
I watch the fury of nature below me…
In the midst of the toil in my head…
One thought emerges from the chaos…
“Why…?”
My grandest of questions…
My oldest of riddles…
Why can’t I escape this fate…?
Why don’t I deserve freedom…?
Why must this struggle live on…?
Those who’ve heard my story know…
I have stood here before…
Time and Time and Time again…
“Why?” I ask myself…
It is this, my greatest of virtues…
And my most fatal of flaws…
My grand naivety…
My faith in humanity…
I strive to see what’s good…
In the hearts of mankind…
My thoughts have echoed unto this world…
For years now...
Yet, here I am…
A single voice…
In an empty room…
Is there truly no one else…?
Who sees this world…
The way I do?
Faces race across my mind…
Thoughts of friends…
And those I’ve kept close to my heart…
Surely one would stand with me…
Yet none stand from the rest…
I wonder to myself…
Does this world hold such a place…
For a Dreamer…?
For someone like me…?
…
No…
This cannot be…
For I am standing here...
Holding onto this moment…
As the snow gently falls…
Upon this mighty river…
This glimpse of time may be all I have…
But it I can call my own…
No matter how small it may be…
As it fades into the next…
I will find myself another…
Another moment to hold…
Another heart to seek…
Another dream to forge…
Again… And Again… and Again…
I will do what must be done…
Until I’ve found my place…
My purpose…
My peace…
Like this river below me…
I will endure…
As I always have…
Since my beginning…
I shall persevere…
As the seasons change…
And time drifts ever ahead…
The wind howls…
My thoughts interrupted…
The sound of footsteps…
Slowly closing in…
A friend approaches…
It is time…
To heave a heavy sigh…
And let everything go…
My moment has come and gone…
And now I know what must be done…
Here I go…
